It’s difficult. We sympathise. Despite being an entirely different shape and size we have an uncanny ability to turn up in the same outfit (usually black) and order the same dishes. We both wear glasses, drape ourselves in scarves and fancy Daniel Craig. But here are some useful distinguishing features:
* Fiona S is the tall fit one who works out regularly on her cross trainer. Fiona B is shorter, blonder and, er, plumper. She talks the talk about exercising but rarely gets round to it
* Fiona B drives. Fiona S is driven.
* Fiona B has 4 grown-up children and step-children. (Well grown-up in theory, anyway.) Fiona S sensibly doesn’t which may be why she can afford more expensive handbags than Fiona B.
* Fiona S is a party girl who hangs out with chefs. Fiona B hangs out on Twitter
* Fiona B is more tech savvy. She actually knows how to upload words and pictures on this website. Fiona S can't fathom it (but has recently discovered emojis ...)
* Fiona B lives in Bristol and has a house in the Languedoc. Fiona S lives in London and the Isle of Wight where she attends the annual rock festival
* Fiona B has a weakness for chick flicks - and French nouvelle vague. Fiona S likes a dance
Other striking similarities: Both Fionas are convent-educated - and you know what that means . . . Both hate funfairs, cupcakes and window seats. (Neither of us sleeps on planes). And - get this - both married their husbands without telling their families and celebrated with lunch at the same restaurant, Bibendum. In the same month, October, but mercifully not the same year which would have been too spooky for words.
It’s difficult. We sympathise. Despite being an entirely different shape and size we have an uncanny ability to turn up in the same outfit (usually black) and order the same dishes. We both wear glasses, swathe ourselves in scarves and fancy Daniel Craig.
© 2015-21 Fiona Beckett & Fiona Sims (the2fionas.com), photography © Gary Latham, website by Scend